Always A Bridesmaid

My Rouses Everyday, July & August 2018

We’ve both stood in and attended a lot of weddings in our 27 and 26 years of living. A lot. Don’t get us wrong — weddings, eternal happiness and all of that jazz are beautiful things that we both hope to have one day. Not to mention open bar and cake! I mean, weddings (in general) rock.

But being in the bridal party is, let’s just say, not always as glamorous as it looks when you are a little girl. So, what’s the worst part of being in the bridal party? Besides the other bridesmaids? Kidding!(Kind of.)

I mean, let’s be real. There are always one or two friends that are particularly obsessed with being the better bridesmaid. And there are always girls who promise to “mail you a check” — aka will never pay you back — for that $100 round of shots during the bachelorette. (Hey! I bet this very issue was the inspiration for those digital payment apps like Venmo.)

Then there’s the people constantly inquiring about your love life. Constantly. Of course, this goes on at the wedding too. There’s nothing worse than people either asking you why you’re single or when you plan on getting married. I mean, maybe we have other priorities at the moment, Karen?! Career, health insurance, a 401k … a woman can dream in 2018, right? We are only in our 20s, after all.

Remember that scene in Bridget Jones’s Diary

Not to mention, being a bridesmaid or just being included in a friend or family member’s wedding festivities is such a commitment. Your social calendar is suddenly filled with celebrations for other

Why do there need to be somany parties these days? Engagement parties, couple’s showers, stock-the-bar parties, bridesmaid’s showers, just to name a few. The worst are lingerie parties. It’s always super awkward because the mom and mother-in-law-to-be are there. Hey, Mom, what do you think of this sexy little number? Not to mention, what is it with inviting parents and in-laws to the bachelor and bachelorette parties? It’s super uncomfortable for everyone else there, even if there are no strippers. Talk about a buzz kill.

And you’re expected to bring a gift to every party. Come the actual wedding, you’re expected to get yet another gift for the happy couple.

I have a friend of a friend who is marrying a super Southern guy. He’s a great guy, but of course he comes with a huge family. The wedding is at St. Louis Cathedral in New Orleans, and I kid you not, there have been eight parties. Eight! How much stuff do you need?

We have become jaded with the stereotypical bachelorette party. It probably doesn’t help when you live in a city where you see several on-the-prowl bachelorette groups trotting around your neighborhood each weekend, in addition to those bachelorettes that you actually have to attend yourself. The sashes, the crowns, the X-rated straws; it’s all so tacky and overdone. It can definitely be fun when people get more creative and original with these ideas, though. We went to one where everyone was asked to wear a different colored wig. Maybe it’s the New Orleans girls in us, but we love a good excuse to wear a wig. It feels like you are in disguise for the night, and no one knows what your group is really up to … 😉

One of our friends had to buy a hot pink dress for the bachelorette party. That was super extra. Hot pink is not a flattering color on anyone

Now, let’s talk about the brides … The brides can get a little crazy with their rules these days. In a wedding one of us was in last year, we got an email two weeks prior saying that we couldn’t wear red lipstick, and our nails and toenails

God forbid you look hotter than the bride. We’re not saying this happens every single time, but what’s with the unflattering colors and weirdly covered-up dresses? There is nothing worse than being a bridesmaid at a beach wedding while wearing a million layers of tulle. You might rationalize, telling yourself, okay, at least the professional photos will be nice. Wrong. The dress made you sweat so much that you’ll spend a solid hour untagging yourself from any pictures that might have made it onto Facebook.

The worst part, hands down, is the expense. We’ve both paid for designer bridesmaid dresses that we’ll never wear again. And maid of honor dresses that belong in Great-Grandma’s closet. And you’d think it all ends once you send that $350+ check for your dress. Nope, next come $100+ in alterations and tons of time being spent at fittings.

By the time we are 30, we will each have a closet full of gowns that don’t really go with our skin tone or

We have had to travel out of the city — even out of the country — for several recent weddings. Last year almost all of my vacation days were devoted to weddings: I went to San Antonio, Acapulco, Roatán, and Tegucigalpa. Thankfully, I’m a seasoned travel bargain hunter, but these destination weddings have cost me at least $1,500 each.

As travel junkies, we really don’t mind the travel part. But, it’s not as fun when you don’t get to pick the city or beach town you’re traveling to. Not to mention, there’s the added stress of transportation, who is doing your hair and makeup (will you even like it?), traveling with formal dresses and mandatory white outfits for the welcome cocktails … the list is never-ending. If you thought only brides get to wear white during their wedding weekend, you’re very wrong. The new thing is having all of your guests wear white, and then the bride walks in in the most extravagant jumper or gown in a scandalous color.

We have got to hand it to these brides — smart move to stand out in every single photo that weekend. Do we hate having to buy white outfit after white outfit? Yes. Will we have a white party when we get married? Probably.

Let’s be real. Once you add up the cost of the dress, the bridal shower presents, the travel for the bridal showers, the bachelorette trip, the lingerie party, the stripper (gross), the hair, the makeup, and the flights and hotels for the actual event, you’ll realize you’ll be eating red beans and rice until you pay off that credit card.

But hey, love is a beautiful thing, and we’ll continue to celebrate those lucky people who have found their soulmates. We just might complain about it a little here and there.

Cheers to wedding season, y’all!

Babes & Beignets is a New Orleans-based multimedia lifestyle brand founded by Maggie Robert and Alessandra Madrid. Babes & Beignets covers drinks, dining, travel, fashion, networking, dating and everything in between. Learn more at, and follow their journey on Instagram (@babesandbeignets), Facebook (/babesandbeignets) and Twitter (@beignetbabes).